Cooking in the West

As Easter approaches, and the robins return, my thoughts turn to digging out the spring and summer clothes. I look at my white flabby arms and panic. Then I look at my white flabby legs and become inspired to unload the ironing off the exercise machine, dust it off, and take it for a spin. A few moments later, my inspiration has turned to perspiration, and I begin looking for ways to justify returning to hibernation.

I just received my health screening results in the mail and was delighted that none of my cholesterol levels were in the red zone. This signifies that I can justify continuing my indulgence of the four food groups: sour cream, butter, chocolate, and cream. I tried explaining my philosophy of accepting things I am too lazy to change to my sister Jane, who has the lung capacity and body type of a gazelle. In fact, she was talking to me on the phone while running on her treadmill. I told her she was insane, but considering that a compliment, she e-mailed me these ten health tips when I told her I was brainstorming reasons to avoid dieting and exercise:

#1. It is a well documented fact that for every minute you exercise, you add one minute to your life. This enables you, at 85 years old, to spend an additional 5 months in a nursing home at $8,000 or more per month.

#2. A grandmother started walking 5 miles a day when she turned 60. Now she’s 97 years old, and her family has no idea where she is.

#3. One of my friends joined a health club last year. She spent about 800 bucks. She hasn’t lost a pound. Apparently, you also have to show up and do the exercises.

#4. The reason that people exercise early in the morning is because that is before their brain figures out what they’re doing.

#5. Long walks are wonderful--especially when they are taken by people who annoy you.

#6. Many people have flabby thighs, but fortunately their stomach covers them.

#7. The advantage of exercising every day is that you die healthier.

#8. If you are going to try cross-country skiing to get into shape, start with a small country.

#9. Have you ever noticed the customers in a health food store? They are pale, skinny people who look half dead. In a steak house, you see robust, ruddy people. They are dying of course, but they look terrific!

#10. Try the garlic diet! You won’t actually lose any weight, but you will look thinner to people who are keeping their distance.

Since Jane is blonde, I e-mailed her this response:

A blonde was terribly overweight, so her doctor put her on a diet. “I want you to eat regularly for two days, then skip a day, and repeat this procedure for two weeks. The next time I see you, you’ll have lost at least five pounds.”

When the blonde returned, she’d lost nearly 20 pounds. “Why, that’s amazing!” the doctor said. “Did you follow my instructions?”

The blonde nodded. “I’ll tell you, though, I thought I was going to drop dead that third day.”

“From hunger, you mean?” asked the doctor.

“No, from skipping!”

This week I would like to share some of my favorite Easter recipes and wish you all a blessed Easter! Two of these recipes can be made the night before to be ready for Easter brunch.

Brunch Enchiladas

1 lb. cooked ham, diced

3/4 C. sliced green onion

3/4 Cl chopped green pepper

3 C. shredded Cheddar cheese, divided

10 (7 inch) flour tortillas

5 eggs beaten

2 C. Half-n-Half

1/2 C. milk

1 T. flour

1/4 t. garlic powder

dash hot pepper sauce

Mix ham, onions, and green pepper. Spoon 1/3 C. mixture and 3 T. shredded cheese into each tortilla. Roll up and place seam side down in a greased 9 X 13 pan. Mix eggs, cream, milk, flour, and seasonings. Pour over tortillas, cover, and refrigerate overnight.

The next morning, preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Bake uncovered for 50 to 60 minutes until well set. Sprinkle with remaining cheese and heat 5 more minutes until the cheese melts. Let stand 10 minutes before serving.

Overnight Blueberry French Toast

12 slices day old bread, cut into 1 inch cubes

2 (8 oz.) pkgs. cream cheese, cut into 1 inch cubes

1 C. fresh blueberries

12 large eggs, beaten

2 C. milk

1 t. vanilla

1/3 C. maple syrup

Sauce:

1 C. white sugar

1 C. water

2 T. cornstarch

1 C. fresh blueberries

1 T. butter

Grease a 9 X 13 pan. Arrange 1/2 of the bread cubes in the pan and top with 1/2 of the cream cheese cubes. Sprinkle blueberries over the cream cheese, and then top with remaining bread cubes.

Whisk eggs, milk, vanilla, and syrup together. Pour over bread cubes. Cover and refrigerate overnight.

In the morning, remove from the refrigerator for a half hour before baking. Bake covered at 350 degrees for 30 minutes. Uncover and bake until center is firm and the surface is lightly browned (about 30 minutes more).

Meanwhile, mix sugar, water, and cornstarch. Bring to a boil, stirring constantly and cook for 3 to 4 minutes. Stir in blueberries, reduce to simmer for 10 minutes. Stir in butter.

Serve portions of casserole on plates and top with warm syrup.

Easy Breakfast Casserole

2 lb. pkg. frozen hash browns, thawed

1 lb. pork sausage

1 small onion, diced

5 eggs

1/2 C. milk

1/2 t. onion powder

1/4 t. garlic powder

salt and pepper to taste

12 oz. shredded Cheddar cheese

Heat oven to 350 degrees. Grease an 8 X 8 inch square pan. Add hash browns in an even layer. Brown sausage and onion. Drain and set aside. Whisk eggs, milk, and seasonings. Pour this mixture over the potatoes and sprinkle with half of the cheese. Add sausage and onion in next layer. Sprinkle with remaining cheese. Cover with foil and bake for one hour. Remove foil and bake until a knife inserted in the center comes out clean (about 10 minutes). Let stand 5 minutes before serving. (Double this recipe to make a 9 X 13 casserole).