Cooking in the West

This week, I will go back to school for the fifty-eighth first day of school of my life, and it is bitter sweet that it will be my last first day of school. I am retiring this year after seventeen first days as a student, twenty-five first days as a teacher, and 16 first days as an administrator.

My hat goes off to all the teachers and other working moms who must hit the ground running every day to keep all of the gears turning. I never had an opportunity to be a stay at home mom even though I think I would have loved it. We always had a herd of ungrateful cows that depended on off farm income, so off to work I went. I remember thinking after I went back to work after Christmas break after maternity leave with my first child that I was just going to go down and tell my Superintendent that I could not do this. Somehow I resisted that urge, and then I fell into the swing of being a working mom for the next 21 years.

Although I was envious of stay at home moms, I know that being a stay at home mom is neither easy nor glamorous as evidenced by this essay that I found in my file entitled "column material" that has been sent to me by faithful readers over the years. This list by Jill Smokler has to be shared:

"Ways to Know You're a Stay at Home Mom."

1. At least half of your meals consist of your child’s leftovers.

2. When your husband asks, “What did you do today?” you can’t muster up a single thing to report, despite feeling like you’ve been put through the spin cycle of the washing machine.

3. Your kids ask where you are going when you put on jeans.

4. You can clean your entire house with a package of baby wipes.

5. A “night out” is roaming the aisles at Target alone.

6. The TV has been on all day, but you have no idea what’s happening in world news.

7. Showering is a major accomplishment.

8. You actually know what the fox says, or what it could say at least, because 50% of your time is spent making animal sounds.

9. Your mood depends solely on the length of time your child napped.

10. Putting a bra on means someone special is coming over.

11. On the way out the door, you look down at your kid's crusty food on your shirt and think to yourself, eh, it’s not that bad. Or worse, you pick it off and actually taste it.

12. You fake stomach problems once your husband gets home, just so you can be alone in your own bathroom.

13. Your dog barks when you put “real” shoes on.

14. You have invited solicitors in on more than one occasion and scared them off after asking if they’d like a dirty martini.

15. You have to check the weather outside before you head out because you have no idea how cold or warm it is because you haven’t been out in days.

16. You consider going on Facebook “spending time with your friends.”

17. You’ve been wearing the same outfit for a couple days in a row…and you’re not sure exactly how many “a couple” means.

18. You’ve contemplated performing your own hysterectomy while preparing dinner… more than once.

19. Your vacuum cleaner is a permanent fixture in [insert the busiest room in the house] and hasn’t been unplugged for three months.

20. You have no idea what the date or day of the week is, but you can tell what time it is just by what cartoon is on TV.

21. It’s only 9:00 A.M., and you’ve thought, “I need a drink!”

22. You’re nursing an infant and making macaroni and cheese while simultaneously scheduling a doctor’s visit.

23. The cup of coffee you are drinking at lunch is the cup you made at 5:30 A.M. and just reheated for the 100th time.

24. You don’t want to go to bed at night because the silence is just too beautiful, no matter how tired you are.

This week I want to share a legendary cinnamon roll recipe and variations on fillings for them from faithful reader Donna Schreiman of Waverly, Missouri. Thanks, Donna!

Donna's Cinnamon Rolls:

Mix and let sit for 15 minutes:

3.5 C. warm water

3/4 C. sugar

1/2 C. canola oil

6 T. yeast (Active dry yeast in the jar)

After 15 minutes, add:

1 T. salt

3 eggs, beaten

10.5 C. flour

Mix and knead together for 10 minutes. Let sit for 10 minutes. Oil a pastry sheet, and divide dough in half. Press each half into a rectangle (about 1/4 inch thick.) Combine 1/4 C. melted butter, 1 C. brown sugar, and 1 T. cinnamon. Spread over the two rectangles, and roll them up, but not too tightly. Slice each rectangle into 12 rolls. Place on a baking sheet or disposable aluminum baking pan. Let rise 30 minutes. Bake at 400 degrees for 12 to 15 minutes.

Frosting: Combine 1 stick butter, 1 T. vanilla, 6 C. powdered sugar, and milk to spreading consistency. Frost warm rolls and serve immediately!

Strawberry Filling for Rolls:

4 C. strawberries

1 C. water

1T. lemon juice

1 C. sugar

3 T. cornstarch

Wash, hull, and slice strawberries. Combine 1 C. berries, 2/3 C. water, and lemon juice. Simmer over low heat about 3 minutes. Mix sugar, cornstarch, remaining water, and the rest of the berries, and add to hot mixture. Bring to a boil stirring constantly till thick. Remove from heat and cool. Use as filling in roll recipe above.

Apple Pie Filling for Rolls:

Pat out your dough, and put 1/4 C. melted butter on it. Mix 1 C. brown sugar with 1 T. cinnamon. Sprinkle over the melted butter. Cut up 3 Granny Smith apples and put on sugar mixture. Roll up and bake as directed above.